Frustrated woman with a headacheAt some point in your leadership career, someone you lead will say or do something that seems crazy, illogical, or irrational to you. Maybe you have already had this experience. When it happens, you might be at a loss for what to do next.

If their actions aren’t interfering with or limiting team performance in some way, you might choose to let it go without addressing it. If it is limiting team performance, though, you will need to step in to talk with them about changing the behavior.

When you confront this type of situation, the first thing you need to do is to understand their motivation or reason for the behavior or action. To do that, remember this statement…

Everything that people do makes sense – to them.

Their action might look irrational or illogical to you, and it makes perfect sense to them – based on their knowledge, experience and perspective.

People always have a reason for what they do. You might not understand or see their rationale for what they do. You might not agree with their rationale even when you do see it. And, whether it makes sense to you or not, it makes sense to them.

Here are three questions for you to consider that will help you to make sense of what looks irrational to you…

Is there something I know that they don’t know?

Maybe you think their behavior makes no sense because you have information that they don’t have, and, if they had it, they would choose a different response to the situation.

Are they operating under a constraint of some kind?

Maybe they have a time, money, resource, or process constraint that drove them to make the choice they made. When you understand that constraint, their behavior looks completely rational.

Do they want something out of this situation that I don’t see or understand?

Maybe what they experienced (or expected to experience) as a result of their behavior is something that you would not want to experience, and, based on that difference in desire, their behavior makes no sense to you.

The main thing to remember as you attempt to address behaviors, actions, and decisions that make no sense to you is that it definitely made sense to the person who chose to behave or act in that way. In order to effectively engage in a conversation with them about their action or decision, remain curious about their motivation rather than judgmental about their knowledge or competence.

In the Bud to Boss workshop, we spend a lot of time discussing how to handle the difficult and uncomfortable situations that new leaders are facing in their role. This powerful training equips them with the skills they need to prepare them for all of the unexpected challenges they’ll face. Learn more here.

 

Want more articles like this?

Subscribe to any of our e-newsletters to get them delivered directly to your inbox.

Guy is our team’s night owl and Kevin’s co-author. He’s thoughtful and deliberate. Guy is our stealth warrior, completing projects that move our team ahead. His speaking and consulting gigs keep him on the road regularly, and he is always happy to return to his family. Guy is a wise and insightful coach, warm and supportive. He’s definitely someone you want to know.

Share your thoughts

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked

{"email":"Email address invalid","url":"Website address invalid","required":"Required field missing"}